5 things you MUST NEVER tell a pregnant woman

July 2, 2015 Shubhreet

Ok! Instead of giving a brief intro, I’m gonna cut right to the chase. I have a cranky teething baby
who might or might not decide that she either wants to feed this very second or go ape shit!

Like most pregnant women, I didn’t like advice. Unless we specifically ask for it, don’t give it. We have Google and BabyCenter. We also have our doctors. So here are 5 things that please please purleeeeese don’t say to your pregnant friend, daughter-in-law, niece, friend’s friend etc etc.

1. You have no idea how difficult it is.
Thanks! I had no idea you were a genius for figuring that out either. And how is telling a pregnant woman this again and again- with her big belly, aching back, swelling ankles, nausea and crazy hormones – helping the situation any way!!??!!

2. Labour is so painful, you’ll want to die.
Really! That’s a shocker! I thought I’ll say ouch and the baby will just pop out! (Rolling my eyes).

Freaking her out about labour is just purposely adding stress. Thank God for my mom and few friends who did not over hype it and that actually made the process easier.

3. Telling her what she can and can’t do.
The way most people reacted when I told them we were not calling our parents over to help when the baby arrived, you’d think I just announced I’m airing my labour live on TV!We wanted to do it our way ourselves which is quite unheard of back home. Honestly, best decision we ever took (read more about it here). I got really tired of hearing how I won’t be able to manage. If she wants to try something; always encourage her decisions, not discourage. No harm in trying.

4. Make sure you have a natural birth.
Okay! I’ll just snap my fingers, tap my toes and little birdies will come and deliver my child naturally.

I had a natural but the amount of judgement some of my friends received for having a C-sec is beyond ridiculous. Lets get this straight – labour cannot be predicted. There is no ‘making sure’ of anything. When push comes to shove and the doctor says ‘we need to do a C-sec’; we are not going to argue!

5. Breastmilk is the best. Breastmilk breastmilk breastmilk blah blah blah…
I decided to breast feed for at least a year if possible. But the pressure on mothers to breastfeed is getting a bit much. Stress is anyhow a leading cause of low production and perpetually discussing it or dropping hints only adds to it – the stress, not the production!

It creates guilt if she can’t or chooses not to bf. It does not make her a bad mother and her formula fed baby will still grow up well. It is also none of your business.